One of life’s realities is that major improvements take time. They don’t happen overnight. But because so many of today’s products and services promise overnight perfection, we’ve come to expect instant gratification—and we become discouraged when it doesn’t happen.
However, if you make a commitment to learn something new every day, getting just that little bit better every day, then eventually—over time—you will reach your goals. The World Belongs To The Brave.
Becoming a master takes time.
You have to practice, practice, practice! You have to hone your skills through constant use and refinement. It takes years to have the depth and breadth of experience that produces expertise, insight and wisdom.
Every book you read, every class you take, and every experience you share is just another building block in your career and your life. Don’t shortchange yourself by not being ready when your big break appears.
Make sure you have done your homework and honed your craft. Actors usually have to do a lot of preparation—acting classes, community theater, off-Broadway plays, bit parts in movies and television, more acting classes, voice lessons, accent training, dancing lessons, martial arts training, learning to ride a horse, more bit parts—until one day they are ready for the dream part that is ready for them. Successful basketball players learn to shoot with their opposite hand, improve their free-throw, and work on their three-pointers.
Artists experiment with different media. Airline pilots train for every kind of emergency in a flight simulator. Doctors go back to school to learn more procedures and obtain advanced certifications. They are all engaged in a process of constant and never-ending improvement.
Make a commitment to keep getting better and better every day in every way. If you do, you’ll enjoy the feelings of increased self-esteem and self-confidence that come with self-improvement, as well as the ultimate success that will inevitably follow.
Raise your standards. Raise your expectations. Raise your minimums of what you will allow into your life that does not honor or respect you.
The World Belongs To The Brave, No One Remembers Cowards.
Although it can be a hard pill to swallow, sometimes we need not look any further than our own selves to discover why life isn’t working for us. Want to make things better? The first step is to stop looking at people or circumstances to change, and change you. Here’s why. Sometimes we need some fucking honesty to get us through the rough spots in our lives.
While compliments and the softer advice of friends to keep our chins up when things get troublesome can serve a purpose – these spoons full of sugar should have some real medicine in them.
All the stuff that’s going well in your life – you get to take credit for it. That’s right – if you’ve experienced any success, any joy, and even the slightest amount of happiness, it’s all on your shoulders. (Aside from the touch of Grace that helped you get out of your own way to achieve those things, if that’s your thing). The flip side of that is while we get to take credit for our successes, we also need to get real and take responsibility for our failures, too. Truth be told – if you’re going to grow, you’re going to fuck up. And often, and bad.
The Blame Game
It isn’t about taking the “blame.” Blame is for the ego. But it is about taking our power back when we assume responsibility for all the circumstances and relationships in our short lives.
When we look honestly at what we are doing that is working, and what isn’t, solutions to our problems start to appear. This results from stepping out of denial. Success begins when we forget about what other people are doing, and simply decide how we want to live our lives. It is simple as that really!
What I can tell you - we can all stand to lighten up about our dark sides. This gives us permission to stop lying about ourselves, and to ourselves.
Think, “If you’re running late, don’t blame fake traffic!!!” While this specific lie is funny, it becomes a bad joke when we think of all the ways we do lie – which prohibits forward movement.
Hate your job? Stop pretending you love it, and you might come up with a fresh solution to transition into the job of your freeking dreams.
Is your relationship a total wreck? Stop pretending that it isn’t, and you can come up with a way to love yourself more, and attract a more appropriate mate.
By getting real about our weaknesses, we can start to tackle our smaller personal fouls, and “shittier habits” without feeling guilt or shame about them, while finding a sense of humour. I call this “forgetting excuses”. Those excuses are just simply a metaphor for our inner voices – those things we tell ourselves we won’t do, but then we do again and again. Shit!
Check Your Ways
The amount we edit and manage our bodies — getting dressed, washing, waxing or drying our hair — is massive compared to how little we manage what’s going on in our own heads.
Have you broken a promise to yourself to love everything about YOU before 8AM? Own that shit. And then do what you must to change it. When you get out of bed, listen to positive affirmations. Write down encouraging things in your journal, or keep a list of things to be grateful for – these are all courageous acts of getting real and changing what is going on in your mind more consistently, so that it reflects out into the world as a different experience.
Dysfunctional self-talk keeps us from realizing our dreams. For some of us it’s like a 24-hour Olympic sports commentary on all our faults. While it's good to take ownership of our real faults, most limiting self-talk is ego-based, which means it’s a big fat lie. It’s destructive and totally non-useful.
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One study on self-talk found that the more you talk down to yourself or see the world as one big calamity, the less likely your mind is to roam free and come up with amazing solutions to your current problems. Negative self-talk is like being pinned down in a MMA ring, ground and pound. You can’t move and explore, to come up with new ways of thinking and being.
Listen, if life sucks right now – maybe it’s you – but by all means don’t take that as an insult. This also means that you have the power to make things better, to change. So good in fact, that you get to take credit for the miraculous things that appear when you take 100% responsibility for change. Ownership is the name of the game, extreme ownership.
Fear is the result of a lack of confidence. A lack of confidence is the result of not knowing what you can do. A lack of knowing what you can do is caused by a lack of experience. A lack of experience is caused by a lack of doing something new.
Remember; Always give no Fucks. Even if you think you have some fucks to give, deep down - squash them down further and don’t give any... like ever!
It All Starts With Believe, Chase The Greatness!